Self Esteem and Stress

How does self esteem relate or sometimes add to stress?

How we view ourselves also impacts how we view and interact with the world and others around us. It forms our mindset which is what gives us the ability to be resilient in times of stress. Stressful times are inevitable in life however our ability to manage stress and not stay in a state of stress is what is important.

Modern day Womxn are often faced with self esteem issues. We want to be all things to everyone all the time, we want to be perfect, to make everyone happy and that often results in us leaving ourselves behind which results in disconnect to ones self, stress and overwhelm. The pressure we are under in todays world is insane, from working full time, to having a side hustle, to staying fit, to being a loving Mum and partner. We wear so many hats and it often seems there aren't enough hours in the day! When we can't be all things to everyone we are our own harshest critic and make ourselves feel guilty for not living up to our own expectations. We sometimes fear reaching out for help and support because we don't want others to think that we don't have it all under control all the time.

Then on top of all that we compare ourselves to other women on social media forgetting that social media is just a highlight reel of someone's life which just adds more pressure.

A lot of this stress comes from the standards and pressure we put on ourselves to be a certain way or to be a certain person. In most cases no one has told us that we need to be a certain way in order to be loved and accepted but that is what we are tell ourselves.

We tell ourselves this is what the perfect employee looks like, the perfect daughter, the perfect wife, girlfriend, fiancé or Mum. We set the bar so high that the standard we have set is unachievable then we beat ourselves up for not reaching that standard 100% of the time.

It is no wonder we are stressed, exhausted overwhelmed when that is the kind of pressure we are putting on ourselves.

I have news for you, those that love and respect you do not do so conditionally based on you being a perfect human 100% of the time, because guess what? they aren't a perfect human either! If anyone makes you feel less than the queen that you are or that you are not living up to some unattainable standard they are not worth your energy and its time to draw some healthy boundaries.

Most of all I want you to draw some healthy boundaries with yourself, be empathetic with yourself and only speak to yourself how you would speak to a friend. Stop measuring your worth based on money in the bank, or how many items you ticked off your to do list, or your career, or material items you are able to buy or pleasing everyone around you all the time (because that is completely not possible and will almost certainly lead to you burning out).

Start with being happy with you, celebrate your strengths, heck even celebrate your flaws and weaknesses they make you perfectly imperfect. Best of all they make you, you!

It is about time more Womxn stand up and say no more! We don't need to live up to these standards and we won't put that kind of pressure on ourselves. Our lives are our lives and we should live them in the perfect balance for us and what makes us happy, there is no right or wrong only what is right for that person.

My friends, that starts right here with you, go forth and love yourself!

Love and light.

Until next time,

Rebecca xx

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